Ed Parnell's Cunning Plan

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Archive for July 1st, 2011

Chilly Feet – Imgur

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Chilly Feet – Imgur.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 11:19 am

Posted in Funny

Police: Man assaults unconscious woman on the sidewalk in broad daylight – NBCActionNews.com – Kansas City

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KANSAS CITY, Missouri – A Kansas City man faces a sexual assault charge after police say he assaulted an unconscious woman on the sidewalk during the day Wednesday. He told police, “I thought the lady was dead.”

Melvin L. Jackson, 48, was charged Thursday with a felony count of sexual assault.

At around 11:30 a.m. Wednesday, police were called to the 3400 block of Troost Avenue on a report of a rape. When officers arrived, they spoke with a witness who said she saw a man having sexual intercourse with a victim, who was unconscious, on the sidewalk outside of a vacant business.

The witness told police a man came into her business and said he believed someone was getting assaulted outside. The witness walked outside and saw the victim lying on the ground in fetal position and a man positioned over the victim with his pants and underwear around his ankles.

The witness said she confronted the suspect. He reportedly pulled up his pants and began walking northbound on Troost.

The witness said she waved down an officer on Troost and police arrested Jackson a short time later.

When police asked Jackson why his pants were unzipped, he said he touched a lady’s leg and then said, “I thought the lady was dead.”

via Police: Man assaults unconscious woman on the sidewalk in broad daylight – NBCActionNews.com – Kansas City.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 11:17 am

Posted in Crime, Disgusting, Dumb

Lists.

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Women like lists, apparently. They like order. So when this lady made a list of things she wanted to do this summer, she thought it would be a good idea for her bf to make a list as well.

This is the result.

 

 

mUAmG.png (PNG Image, 835×1041 pixels).

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 8:35 am

Posted in Funny Pics

5 Guys robbed in White Plains; 4 guys and a gal charged | The Journal News | LoHud.com

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WHITE PLAINS — In what was described as a “brazen,” but brainless crime, four guys and a gal are charged with the armed robbery of the newly opened Five Guys Burgers & Fries restaurant early this morning.

Cops were called to the eatery, which opened last week at 240 Main St., shortly after midnight on a report of three men wearing rubberized gloves with bandanas covering their faces demanding the day’s receipts from the manager. One of the stickup men brandished a revolver. The men fled after taking an undetermined amount of cash.

Investigators immediately reviewed video of the incident and quickly broadcast a description of the trio, who were stopped a few blocks away in about the time it takes to eat a hamburger. Timothy Crawford, 26, of 25 Mitchell Place, who works as a cook at the restaurant, was taken to Police Headquarters along with two other White Plains men: Anthony Bush, 24, of 27 Washington Place, and Marcus Beechum, 21, of 2 Beech St.

via 5 Guys robbed in White Plains; 4 guys and a gal charged | The Journal News | LoHud.com.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 8:27 am

Posted in Crime

Man ordered to remove ‘BO11 LUX’ number plate – Odd News – Digital Spy

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A man from Chesterfield has been told to remove his car number plate, which reads ‘BO11 LUX’.

The demand came from the DVLA (Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency), a British government organisation which sorts out driving licences and sells personalised number plates.

Alan Clarke, 49, bought the plate six weeks earlier from the DVLA website for £399 ($638) to put on his black Range Rover, before he received a letter informing him that it was “causing offence”.

The car owner has so far refused to carry out the request to remove it, according to the Mirror. He said: “It’s my plate and I’m not taking it off… They are threatening to criminalise me.

“They are a government agency and put the plate on their own website. I saw it there and thought it would be fun to put it on my new car. Everyone laughs when they see it. They sent me a normal plate to put on but I sent it back. They’ve still got similar plates on the site.”

Clarke faces a fine of up to £1,000 ($1,600) if he fails to comply, while the DVLA has insisted that he would be refunded for the number plate.

The DVLA explained: “We try to identify combinations that may cause offence. When potentially offensive plates slip through the net, steps are taken to withdraw the registration number.

via Man ordered to remove ‘BO11 LUX’ number plate – Odd News – Digital Spy.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 8:23 am

Posted in Dumb

Breakfast Cereals Americans No Longer Love – 24/7 Wall St.

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Corn Flakes

> Company: Kellogg

> Year Introduced: 1894

> 52-Week Sales Through April: $107.5 million

> Pct. Change During That Period: -5.86%

> Pct. Change Sales 2007-2010: -3.8%

Originally developed in 1894 by Dr. John Harvey Kellogg, the superintendent of the Battle Creek Sanitarium, as a way to promote the benefits of a vegetarian diet. It’s an American classic like apple pie that is facing hard times because of the growth of private label brands. Also, it’s being undermined by newer organic brands.

via Breakfast Cereals Americans No Longer Love – 24/7 Wall St..

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 5:34 am

Posted in Food

Every Day Posters Every Day

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Every Day Posters Every Day.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 4:53 am

Posted in Funny Pics, Interesting

Punctuation – University of Oxford

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As a general rule, do not use the serial/Oxford comma: so write ‘a, b and c’ not ‘a, b, and c’. But when a comma would assist in the meaning of the sentence or helps to resolve ambiguity, it can be used – especially where one of the items in the list is already joined by ‘and’:

They had a choice between croissants, bacon and eggs, and muesli.

There are some cases where the comma is clearly obligatory:

The bishops of Canterbury, Oxford, Bath and Wells, and Salisbury

The comma in relative clauses:

The defining clause: if the defining clause were omitted, the meaning would be radically changed – NO COMMAS

Students who study here are very intelligent

The researcher who uses the library is likely to be better informed

The non-defining clause: this adds information to an otherwise complete sentence – USE COMMAS

Students at Oxford University, who are all members of one college or another, have to work very hard

NOTE that in the defining clause either ‘which’ or ‘that’ may be used:

The research was carried out with a thoroughness that was enviable

The research was carried out with a thoroughness which was enviable

But in the non-defining clause, only ‘which’ should be used:

The research, which was carried out over a period of three years, was very thorough

via Punctuation – University of Oxford.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 2:20 am

Posted in Books

Awesome Parenting

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loVQJ.jpg JPEG Image, 1280×768 pixels – Scaled 83%.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 1:33 am

Posted in Funny Pics

FT.com / FT Magazine – Invasion of the body hackers

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Michael Galpert rolls over in bed in his New York apartment, the alarm clock still chiming. The 28-year-old internet entrepreneur slips off the headband that’s been recording his brainwaves all night and studies the bar graph of his deep sleep, light sleep and REM. He strides to the bathroom and steps on his digital scale, the one that shoots his weight and body mass to an online data file. Before he eats his scrambled egg whites with spinach, he takes a picture of his plate with his mobile phone, which then logs the calories. He sets his mileage tracker before he hops on his bike and rides to the office, where a different set of data spreadsheets awaits.

“Running a start-up, I’m always looking at numbers, always tracking how business is going,” he says. Page views, clicks and downloads, he tallies it all. “That’s under-the-hood information that you can only garner from analysing different data points. So I started doing that with myself.”

via FT.com / FT Magazine – Invasion of the body hackers.

Written by edparnell

July 1, 2011 at 1:17 am

Posted in Psychology, Science

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