Archive for September 30th, 2011
You’re on an impromptu date at the local Starbucks with someone you just met on BLENDR—the all-new, all-straight hook up app taking the Internet by storm. There’s some chatting, some sipping. You’re like, I went to NYU and he’s all, Oh, I went to a small school in Boston. Well, not in Boston exactly, but next to Boston. You have a couple of friends who went to that school, seems like they all say that. But that’s not even the weird part. You ignore the fact that he’s sporting one of those ironic 19th century mustaches—you’re more ignoring that it kind of works on him. You overlook the fact that though he does look exactly like his BLENDR picture, a rarity in online dating, he’s actually shorter than you. You can deal, you’re saying.
This is a great guy, you’re thinking. I’d like to get to know him better, you’re saying. But then out of nowhere at the end of the date he hits you with the whole, Oh-and-I’m-bisexual-is-that-going-to-be-a-problem? thing.
Seeing as how you don’t really want to come off as homophobic, you nervously sip from your double Americano, then: Um, I guess not? I mean, I was in college once so I know how that goes. At the end of the date you give him a big hug—specifically not a kiss, as you are not keen to kiss a guy’s mouth that as far as you know could have had a penis inside of it as recently as two hours ago.
The Occupy Wall Street protesters camped out in Lower Manhattan’s Zuccotti Park are buzzing over a big secret musical guest scheduled to play this afternoon at around 4pm. We hear that it’s Radiohead, who are in New York for a couple concerts.
It makes sense: Radiohead’s lead singer Thom Yorke has a history of lefty anti-globalization protest. What do you think: Are the millionaires from Radiohead authentic enough to be the bards of revolution? They’re certainly capable of mobilizing people: When their New York show sold out in minutes they almost caused a Twitter riot.
Update: It’s been confirmed by Occupywallstreet.org the official website of Occupy Wall Street. An Occupy Wall Street spokesman told me, they have no permit but the police are “aware” of the event.
Update 2: Well! A Radiohead spokesman says the performance is not happening, though people on the ground still insist it is.